Here's comes the Annual Fear of Failure marathon!!

And week 5 begins! After yesterday's time change, I was worried that it would be dark outside this morning when I got up to run. Fortunately, it was fairly light and just misty - the kind of misty day that covers the island, so the bay looks like the sea. The perfect setting for a murder mystery novel! And a pretty good day to run too, since it was warmer when I got up than it is now. The time change had made it tough to fall and stay asleep, so I was pretty grouchy when my alarm went off at 7, which is saying a lot, since I'm not a morning person generally. But I forced myself to get up and run, because I figured that it would put me in a better mood and at least the rush of endorphins would help. It was a good thing I did, because it worked!

Today's workout was three 5-minute intervals, with 3 minute walking breaks. Since I'd already been running five minute intervals all last week, I knew I'd be up for it. I felt great at the end of the three intervals, a bit sore of course, but loving the tight exhaustion in my quads. I get a daily email from a social media guru I know, full of reporter queries, and he just got back to running yesterday after taking a hiatus because of anke injuries. His comments made me crack up - "I felt really, really, really good. Until the endorphins wore off. Ankles, though, are fine. Quads fell out of my legs yesterday afternoon, I think they're hiding under the couch. But that said, it's still so nice to be back." So I guess once you're hooked on this, you just learn to manage the pain so you can keep running! Fortunately, since my first run, my muscles have actually felt pretty great, just used for a change!

I was feeling pretty confident when I got home, and checked this week's couch potato plan just to make sure I was on schedule. That's when I found out that a) I'm supposed to run 5 and 8 minute intervals on Wednesday and b) I'm supposed to run 20 straight minutes on Friday.

Um, WHAT?!

Five minutes is about my limit as it is! I always figured I would push myself (obviously, or how to do I plan to run a 5k, let alone 18 miles!). I just thought it would come later, like closer to week 9. And I think it's weird I then go back to 5 and 8 minute intervals on Monday again. I thought I might have entered it into Outlook incorrectly, so I checked the plan online. And there it was in black and white: "Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog two miles (or 20 minutes) with no walking."

NO walking?!? Not even a little bit?

I'm dreading this already. And after my mind over matter comments, I know that I need to work on not psyching myself out. But I'm actually a little scared. Even running the mile in high school and college, when I hit my excellent 16 and 12 minute times, I walked some of it (all right, stop laughing, it's really not that funny). I don't think I've ever run 20 consecutive minutes IN MY LIFE. I guess this is where they separate the men from the boys. Am I serious about wanting to be a runner or not?

Yes.

YES.

But I'm still a little afraid. So we'll take it one workout at a time. Wednesday, I have to run an 8-minute interval, which, in light of the 20 minutes on Friday, seems incredibly do-able. So I'll start with that. And I'm already getting some positive encouragement for Friday, with my sister telling me in no uncertain terms "YOU CAN DO IT!!!" O-kay, I certainly hope so, because I still want to cry a little bit. We'll see what Friday brings...